Lord, I am sorry for abandoning my pursuit of you. I grew weary of the race and got off track. This side path is leading nowhere good, except to deadly drop-offs. Restore me Lord; hone my focus; cut off my sin, my idols. My life blood is from you alone. This other stuff is weakening and poisonous. My head is cloudy and my senses are confused. Be my rock, dear Saviour. Return the light of your love to my eyes before I faint. I am desperate for your oxygen; all other ground is sinking sand.
Forgive my sins, all that I have allowed to take over ground in my heart – destroy it! I know now quite well the symptoms of a wayward heart, and my heart reeks with the stench of them. Consume me with your holy fire. Breathe life back into my soul. Remove the chains of bondage I have attached to my wrists. Remove the shackles from my feet. Lord I want to dance before you with wild abandon. Receive me into your presence. Consecrate me wholly unto you. Teach me to live with a thorn in my side. Remind me daily that I live in a body of sin, that even though my spirit is willing, my flesh is weak. I must always be alert to that fact and put on your holy armor, so that I may take a stand against the devil’s schemes.
No doubt Satan has been tempting me to despair. He has sent his forces to try to devour me. I am far from “home”, exceedingly vulnerable, a prime target. Lord, do not let me fall! Bind me up with cords that cannot be broken. Weave and grow me into you. You are the vine and I am the branch. Do not allow me to be cut off!
Renew my soul. Fill my veins. Set my heart ablaze once more for you. Let truth be my light; let all else fade. You are my one and only and I worship you. May my life be a testimony of the riches of your grace. Remind me daily that I have been set free. You do not condemn me, therefore neither shall anyone or anything else.
Remove my shame and my guilt. Take off the veil of death shrouding my face. My face should be radiant, belonging to one who is not ashamed. I confess that that is not how I am living today. Rather than living boldly, I’ve been cowering in the shadows. The fullness of life that you offer has only felt like something out of reach, too lofty for me to attain. But the truth is I do not need to attain it, for you give it freely. It is already mine, just as your perfect peace that surpasses understanding is mine.
Lord, I wish to dwell in that peace. Come Holy Spirit and minister to my soul for I feel near to death, lost and afraid. Be my comfort and my strength, for I want none other than yourself. There is that lump in my throat that prevents me from breathing deeply of the aroma of your presence and your promises. Tear out my sin. I’d rather bleed to death in righteousness that to continue “living” in this way. May the thoughts of my mind and the words of my mouth be pleasing to you. Selah.
